Janus brings Hayley back from Australia, after she breaks her oath to Diamond
- Hayley is sitting on the west coast of Australia at night.
- Hayley is several km N of her old school.
<Janus> * Sound of many beating wings...
- Janus steps out of the shadows.
<Hayley> (I know it's in that bit of story... but, it's what she'd do... I'm interested in what you'll do)
- Hayley doesn't turn around to look at you.
<Hayley> Hello Janus. <Janus> Hello, Hayley. <Hayley> I was wondering when you'd show up. <Hayley> Did Windrider miss me?
- Janus 's voice sounds tired, yet displeased.
<Hayley> Or was it the Countess? <Janus> He told me what happened, yes.
- Hayley nods her head, still facing the waves.
<Hayley> I couldn't stay there anymore. I'm sorry. <Janus> Sorry? <Janus> Do you even begin to comprehend what it is that you've done?
- Hayley turns slightly to look at him.
- Janus takes a step closer.
<Hayley> I broke an oath, yada-yah. <Janus> You don't, do you? <Janus> You truly are a child!
- Janus says, angrily.
- Hayley says calmly, but she is trembling.
<Janus> Beyond the dishonour you've brought to my mother's name, have you *any idea* what this means? <Hayley> I couldn't just sit there, twiddling my thumbs. <Hayley> I have to /do/ something.
- Hayley looks decidedly unhappy.
<Janus> There's doing something, and then there's breaking an oath to House Eiluned! <Hayley> Are you going to put me to death then?
- Janus sighs, rubs the bridge of his nose.
<Janus> I'm going to take you back. <Hayley> Try if you like, it ought to be interesting. <Hayley> I'm not going back. <Janus> I may be able to convince them to let this pass... <Hayley> Aren't you listening? <Hayley> I'm not going back. <Hayley> I can't stand it there! <Hayley> Everything reminds me - <Janus> Reminds you of what?
- Hayley clamps her mouth shut and turns away from Janus.
<Janus> What about my family's hospitality so revolted you that you had to break our sacred oaths? <Hayley> It wasn't the hospitality. It was very kind of you and your mother. <Janus> You have a strange way of repaying kindness.
- Hayley 's eyes flash.
<Hayley> I'm sorry. <Hayley> I couldn't stay there any longer- I was losing myself there!
- Hayley 's voice is a bit strangled.
<Hayley> (she's half-facing Janus, but not looking at him) <Janus> ... <Janus> What is it you're not telling me? <Hayley> I- Don't ask me to say it, please...
- Hayley has turned to face him, eyes pleading.
<Janus> Say what?
- Janus looks wary.
- Hayley turns her face away and down, an unpleasant frown twisting her features.
- Hayley shifts smoothly to another tack, trying to change the subject.
<Hayley> I went by my old home... <Hayley> There's a new family there... with a baby. <Hayley> They look so happy. <Hayley> Not like my family, wherever they are. <Janus> ... <Hayley> . o O (Did it work? Maybe if he feels sorry for me he won't pursue the subject.) <Janus> Always these little games.
- Hayley looks up sharply at Janus.
<Hayley> Games? <Hayley> Yes, I suppose they are. But you play them too, and your mother is all time champion of mind games.
- Janus looks slightly disgusted.
<Janus> Don't speak about my mother!
- Janus says hotly.
- Hayley smiles in a conniving fashion, but underneath it all she seems to be very uncertain...
<Janus> Listen Hayley, regardless of whatever unspeakable thing that you can't tell me... <Janus> I can't allow you to just wander off.
- Hayley changes her expression again, slightly more pleasant.
<Janus> You are my responsibility... <Hayley> If you're worried about me, don't be. <Hayley> I'm quite capable of taking care of myself. Quite.
- Hayley mimics Diamond.
- Janus 's beautiful features twist in fury and he raises a hand to slap Hayley...
- Hayley cringes and runs off a distance.
<Hayley> Don't touch me! <Hayley> Don't fucking touch me!
- Hayley screams.
<Janus> You are nothing but a child who needs ... discipline!!
- Janus yells in frustration.
<Hayley> I am not Dianna. <Hayley> (How does she know about Dianna? o_O ) <Hayley> I am trying to protect you. <Janus> *Dianna* had better-- <Hayley> Don't touch me. Go away and leave me alone! <Janus> How do you know about Dianna? <Hayley> I know about her. <Hayley> I know about a lot of things.
- Hayley 's face twists in agony.
<Janus> That was almost a century ago. Who told you? <Hayley> 10 000 years of things!
- Janus approaches her warily.
<Hayley> DON'T TOUCH ME! <Janus> ...
- Hayley screams and moves away a bit further.
<Janus> What is going on?
- Janus comes closer.
- Hayley flares into a Starbody.
<Hayley> DON'T!
- Janus jumps back, instinctively throws up his hands...
<Hayley> (Starbody - Uh, where'd she learn /that/?) <Hayley> Good...
- Hayley sobs.
<Hayley> Stay there. <Janus> (To go with your little story...)
- Janus will throw up the same cantrip...
<Hayley> (Aw... ) <Janus> What has happened to you?
- Hayley doesn't seem to be hurling fireballs at you.
- Janus is confused, concerned...
<Hayley> Don't you know? <Janus> There's no way you could have learned so much...
- Janus approaches her again.
- Hayley is still in flames, caressing one arm with the other. She looks decidedly wild.
<Janus> I don't... I don't know.
- Janus reaches out a hand...
<Hayley> NO!
- Hayley snarls, jumping back.
<Hayley> Touching me- that's what will bind you to me again. <Hayley> Go away!
- Hayley sobs, despairingly.
<Janus> Bind me?
- Janus laughs hollowly, and drops his hand.
<Hayley> It's no use me FlickerFlashing again... you'll just find me... you have to go yourself, go away! <Janus> I've already bound myself... <Janus> I tied my own noose, ninety years ago.
- Hayley sobs tears of liquid flame.
<Hayley> Why did you cast that spell, Janus? <Hayley> Why? <Hayley> It would have been better if you hadn't. <Hayley> I don't want to hurt you again. <Janus> There was nothing else *to* do! <Hayley> You could have grieved! <Hayley> You could have gotten over it like everyone else! <Janus> I'm not like everyone else! <Hayley> No, I guess you're not...
- Hayley says sadly.
<Hayley> I wish Windrider hadn't told you. <Janus> Did you think I wouldn't know anyway? <Hayley> Maybe you wouldn't have come. <Hayley> Please go. Go back to Morwen. <Hayley> You deserve her, a Queen, not oathbroken... <Janus> I don't want to talk about Morwen.
- Hayley flares up angrily again.
<Hayley> Are you stupid?
- Janus turns off his Starbody and sits down on a rock.
<Hayley> Don't you realize? <Hayley> There will be another one! <Hayley> There always is! <Hayley> You can't be happy with me! Go AWAY! <Janus> ... <Hayley> I'll go away. <Hayley> I hope you're sensible enough not to follow me.
- Janus looks like someone punched him in the stomach.
<Janus> I have no choice.
- Hayley drops her Starbody and gets ready to cast Flicker Flash, but the expression on Janus' face stays her.
<Hayley> Janus... <Janus> We're the same... <Janus> No matter who else comes along. <Janus> You and I... <Janus> Nobody understands like we do <Janus> No-one else in the universe. <Hayley> Don't say such things, please... <Janus> There's no-one else who knows as we... <Janus> That love, love is a fist, Hayley.
- Janus looks up at her.
<Hayley> Janus, they all knew. Every one of them that I doomed. I remember them... I hurt them all, without meaning to. Love is worse than a fist. It is hell, pure agony, for me. I am afraid of it, and I don't want to love ever again. <Janus> You're wrong... <Hayley> <w> Am I? <Hayley> It is torture for me right now, standing so close to you, and forcing myself not to touch you.
- Hayley backs away step.
<Hayley> I want to die. <Hayley> But I can't.
- Hayley shows her wrists to Janus.
<Janus> What did you do?? <Hayley> I used cold iron, even...
- Hayley looks bewildered.
- Janus exclaims.
<Hayley> Surely cold iron would do it? <Hayley> But it didn't.
- Janus jumps up and grabs her wrists.
- Hayley is too messed up right just now to maintain her distance... he gets hold of her. There's a bunch of ugly-looking scabby scars running the length of her forearms.
<Janus> Why? <Janus> WHy?
- Janus tries to hold back tears, but can't...
<Hayley> So- so I wouldn't have to destroy two more lives... <Hayley> But it didn't work! <Hayley> Always two, there's always two. I can't die until I've met the second one! <Janus> Don't you understand... <Hayley> And then I'll have destroyed two lives anyway... <Janus> It's not you.
- Hayley chokes
<Janus> It's them. <Janus> *Them*...
- Janus spits venomously.
- Hayley is just crying.
<Hayley> Oh, and this crying! I hate it. I never used to cry... <Janus> ... <Hayley> I am so weak... you always hated it when I cried, too... <Janus> Because... I wanted you to be happy... <Janus> Hayley... <Janus> Come back to the manor with me. <Hayley> No...
- Hayley shakes her head.
<Janus> Tara will take care of you, everything will be fine... <Hayley> It hurts too much to be close to you. <Hayley> I just want to be alone. <Janus> ... <Janus> But... <Hayley> It's not anything you did...
- Janus looks hurt, uncomprehending.
<Hayley> I just- I need to be alone. I have all these thoughts and memories in my head, and they're not mine! <Hayley> I can't sort them out! <Janus> I can't leave you... <Janus> Not like this. <Janus> You must return with me.
- Janus says, taking a deep breath to steady himself.
<Janus> I know we've had some... difficulties, but I shall promise not to pressure you in the least... <Janus> We can resume your lessons whenever you like, and I shall endeavour to straighten out this mess with the Countess. <Hayley> Janus... I can't go back there, I remember all the nights we spent together... it torments me. Do you know how often I lay in bed at night at your mother's, thinking of you? Everything about her reminded me of you...
- Hayley looks totally disgusted with herself.
<Janus> I should like to think your memories of our home would be happy... <Hayley> Oh, they are! <Hayley> But - being close to you, and not touching... I can't do that. <Hayley> I just can't. <Hayley> Look - look at what I am? <Janus> You are... a lovely young girl.
- Janus says matter-of-factly.
<Hayley> I'm ten thousand years old, and I'm 150, and I'm 560, and I'm only 14... <Hayley> I'm Siobhan, I'm Gwen, I'm Marjolaine, I'm Debbie, I'm me!
- Hayley is seriously flipping out.
<Janus> That is very strange... that you should remember it all this time...
- Janus says, thoughtfully.
<Janus> But... perhaps I could help you... <Hayley> I don't though-
- Hayley says desperately.
<Hayley> I don't remember- WHY. <Janus> If you come back with me... <Janus> We could work together to ... straighten it out somehow... <Hayley> No!
- Janus says, a little plaintively.
<Hayley> I don't want you to make me forget again. That's what you mean, isn't it? <Janus> No, that's not what I meant. <Janus> I mean... why now, after all this time, should you suddenly remember everything that's happened, finally be aware of the curse?
- Janus speaks rapidly, you can see the little Eiluned hamster running in its wheel.
<Janus> Perhaps... perhaps it is beginning to weaken... <Hayley> You- you asked me to remember...
- Janus stops.
<Janus> I asked you to remember me...
- Hayley digs her hands into her short (remember she cut of most of her hair) curls.
<Hayley> I did, I tried to... thinking of you - I couldn't stop. <Hayley> The oath- the oath- I broke it before I even swore it, Janus. <Hayley> She asked me if I loved you and I swore I didn't... <Hayley> But I didn't know, then... I didn't know. <Janus> Hayley, please... <Hayley> What? <Janus> You don't need to confess anything...
- Hayley 's eyes are totally wild.
<Janus> Calm down...
- Hayley does.
<Hayley> Oh. Oh, god, Janus.
- Hayley says quite sanely.
<Hayley> I can't go back to your place. <Janus> Why not? <Hayley> Rachel- Rachel. <Janus> Rachel is with her grandmother. <Hayley> I know she is... <Janus> I don't understand... <Hayley> I can't be a mother to her, Janus. <Hayley> That's what she wants from me. <Janus> I know that. <Hayley> But I'm only 14! I don't know how to be a mother. <Janus> I will worry about Rachel.
- Janus says reassuringly.
<Hayley> (Is he still touching her? He grabbed her arms to see the scars... then what did he do?) <Janus> (well, you put your hands in your hair, so...)
- Janus puts a hand on her shoulder.
- Hayley moves in close to Janus.
<Hayley> Janus... will you hold me? I've wanted to feel your arms around me for so long...
- Hayley breathes. (Sex Appeal! Sex Appeal!)
<Janus> Hayley, I don't want to... make you uncomfortable... <Janus> . o O (yikes!)
- Hayley looks up at Janus with wide eyes.
<Hayley> You won't, oh, you won't... <Janus> Ah... <Janus> Well, I guess there's no harm...
- Janus looks a little flushed.
- Janus hugs Hayley close...
<Hayley> Oh, Janus...
- Janus sniffs her hair, without thinking about what he's doing.
- Hayley slides her arms around his torso, works one hand up under his shirt and slides it along his back.
<Hayley> (She smells like desert sand and salt breeze) <Janus> Haaa...
- Janus shivers.
<Janus> What... are you doing?
- Hayley stops her hand still and looks up at him.
- Hayley licks her lips.
<Janus> ... <Hayley> I- don't you like it? <Janus> I... well.. <Janus> Obviously... <Janus> ! <Janus> I mean... <Janus> I think perhaps that we might not want to jump into things... quite so soon...
- Janus sounds rather flustered, for some reason.
<Hayley> I am sorry.
- Hayley removes her hand from his shirt.
<Janus> No, no, it's alright, don't apologize... <Hayley> I'm just a child. <Janus> I didn't say that... <Hayley> I want to know what it feels like! I have all these memories... but I've never felt it myself. <Janus> ...
- Hayley lowers her eyelids, as if to hide something she's ashamed of.
<Janus> I think I understand... <Janus> It must be very difficult... <Janus> But I don't want you to do something out of confusion that you might regret.
- Janus is rebuilding his composure.
- Janus is still holding onto her though.
<Janus> . o O (And the same goes for me...) <Hayley> I can't sleep alone, with you in a room down the hall. <Hayley> I- sin.
- Hayley blushes.
<Janus> You what?
- Janus looks genuinely puzzled.
<Hayley> I- think of you and- sin... <Janus> ... <Janus> Oh... <Janus> Oh, I see...
- Janus blushes again.
<Janus> Well, I... <Janus> I suppose that's... flattering... <Hayley> It makes me feel disgusted with myself. I should be stronger than to give in to temptation, but I can't stop myself. If the priests knew, they'd whip me. <Janus> . o O (You know, she is a Wilder, really. So what's the difference?) <Janus> . o O (Shut up!) <Janus> Well, you don't have to worry about what the priests think. <Janus> And anyway, I, ah... <Janus> Well.. <Janus> I think... lots of girls probably... <Janus> ... <Hayley> I wasn't like other girls, at the school.
- Janus gets redder still.
<Hayley> I never did what the priests told me to do. <Hayley> Am I like them now? I used to be proud of being strong. <Janus> Those 'priests' were little more than programmers for some sort of sick cult. <Janus> You're not like anyone else, Hayley. <Janus> And you *are* strong...
- Janus runs a hand through her hair, again without really thinking about it.
- Hayley sighs and shudders.
<Hayley> Please don't do that, if you don't want me to do something back. <Hayley> Do you still want me at your house? I can't control myself. <Janus> Yes... I definitely do... <Hayley> Will you let me go away again if I want to? <Hayley> I will tell you before I leave. <Janus> What do you mean? <Hayley> But being free is very important to me. <Hayley> If I need to get away for a while. <Hayley> Will you let me go? <Janus> Alright... <Janus> So you'll come back with me?
- Hayley nods, a bit reluctantly.
- Janus beams.
<Hayley> I hope you know what you're doing... <Janus> I certainly do! <Janus> . o O (I think we might have a chance to beat those accursed Tuatha yet...)
- Janus hugs her again.
<Janus> . o O ( smells so... earthy... ) <Janus> (stupid Sex Appeal)
- Hayley melts into him... mmm, she's so soft and curvy... and every move she makes is poetry in motion... so graceful, it makes a person's heart flutter and long to be caressed by those long, slender hands...
<Janus> . o O (meep...) <Janus> . o O (I feel like Jell-o... What's wrong with me??) <Hayley> (Sex appeal, ah, what joy. Janus will be fending off droves of men (and some women, too) from Hayley...) <Janus> . o O (I'm acting crazy...) <Hayley> (God, Hayley is a /goddess/ of love...! Better not say that out loud though, in case a goddess hears.) <Janus> (hehe...might end up with snakes for hair) <Janus> Let's go home, Hayley.
- Janus murmurs into her hair.
<Hayley> Mmmm...
- Hayley says into his chest
- Janus will Flicker-Flash them back onto the grounds of the Manor.
<Hayley> (I hope he knows what he's getting himself into... she is still kind of crazy... plus damn horny, plus in her Unseelie legacy... <Janus> (Say, the garden) <Janus> (Hey, that makes two of us) <Janus> (well... sort of. ;D) <Hayley> <m> No Sovereign, ok? <Janus> ... <Janus> All right, if you don't use Pyretics. The furniture is all so expensive.