Janus & Hayley, 4/11/2003

• Hayley seeks Janus out, reluctant and resigned.
• Janus is reading some book he found behind a bookcase.

<Janus> . o O ( I forgot I even had this..>! ) <Hayley> (in his study as usual?) <Hayley> (Hmmm... I wonder what book that is...  :o ) <Janus> (It doesn't really matter)

• Hayley taptaps on the door.

<Janus> Yes?

• Janus looks up.

<Hayley> Hi...

• Hayley sidles in.

<Hayley> Are you busy?

• Janus sets the book down.

<Janus> No, not especially... <Hayley> . o O (Maybe he's too busy and I can tell him another time - oh) <Hayley> Okay. <Janus> I noticed that the shelf wasn't sitting flush to the wall... <Janus> And then I found this wedged behind it!

• Hayley glances at the shelf in question, eager to be sidetracked.

<Hayley> Er, what's that? <Janus> I don't think I've seen it in twenty years.

• Hayley peers at the book.

<Hayley> ("How to turn young girls into toads!")

• Hayley tries to see what book it is.

<Janus> (I dunno... some book on Norse Runic Divination... written in some language you don't recognize... ) <Janus> (There are a bunch of runes on the cover; it looks old) <Hayley> Oh, well... I'm glad you found it, I guess. <Janus> Oh yes... <Janus> Things like this are most difficult to replace :) <Hayley> . o O (I wonder what he'd say if I asked him to teach me how to read things like that so we might have a bit more common ground...) <Hayley> . o O (Well, no point asking until after I know what the future holds.)

• Hayley runs a hand nervously through her curls.

<Hayley> Janus... I need to tell you something that is probably important. <Janus> ... Oh?

• Janus mostly maintains an air of calm.

<Hayley> Well, maybe it isn't important except in a certain way but I don't want to wait to find out the hard way just how important it is. <Janus> ... Oh?

• Hayley nods.
• Janus raises his eyebrows.
• Hayley takes a deep breath.
• Janus has a sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach.

<Hayley> It's about Lord Vale...

• Hayley isn't looking at him at the moment.

<Janus> Really.

• Hayley nods, biting her lip.
• Janus 's voice seems to grow distant.

<Janus> What about him? <Hayley> The time he came to the castle wasn't the only time we ever met... <Hayley> He told me back then... that he could help me and he told me how to find him. <Janus> I see. <Hayley> I didn't go right away. I went to Australia first, and then you came for me and I came home with you. But then things didn't work out very well and I went to Ireland... <Hayley> <m> I don't need to remind you of that... <Janus> . o O ( Things didn't work out very well? You *left*. )

• Hayley curses herself for a fool.

<Janus> . o O ( I suppose... that *didn't* work out very well now did it? ) <Hayley> Anyway... part of the reason I went to Ireland was - was because that's where he said he'd be.

• Janus thins his lips.

<Janus> How very interesting. <Hayley> And it's not because I didn't trust you to be able to - end the curse yourself. <Janus> Of course. <Janus> . o O ( Liar ) <Hayley> I do trust you.

• Hayley looks up at Janus when she says that.

<Janus> So that is why he wants to meet me. <Janus> You're his pet project. <Janus> How charming.

• Janus picks up his book and snaps it shut.
• Hayley snaps her gaze down to the floor and winces as the book snaps shut.

<Janus> And you thought you would just... keep this association with some Unseelie... possibly shadow court sorceror... your little secret.

• Hayley stands with shoulders stooped.

<Janus> Until you thought that I might find out about it. <Janus> Your honesty and trust... is truly touching.

• Janus has his mother's look as he slowly rises from his seat.
• Hayley looks up at Janus, genuine hurt reflected in her eyes.

<Hayley> I didn't leave it... though. <Hayley> I came - I told you...

• Hayley looks afraid and backs away from him slowly until she bumps into the wall behind her.
• Janus crosses the room and slides the volume back onto the bookshelf.

<Janus> Tell me Hayley. Why was Lord Vale so eager to help you, initially? What was in it for him?

• Hayley sighs.

<Hayley> I don't know. He thought the curse was interesting. <Hayley> I know you're angry... you're right to be angry...

• Janus keeps his back turned to her, as though examining the texts on the shelf.
• Hayley swallows.

<Hayley> But I didn't want you to hear it from him first. <Janus> Well, *that* certainly makes all the difference.

• Hayley winces again at the tone of his voice.

<Hayley> I'm sorry... <Janus> Just how many of us *do* you have working for you? <Janus> Are there more benevolent sorcerors out there I shuold expect to hear from in the near future? <Hayley> It's not like that... and no, it's just you, you and him. <Janus> So... <Janus> I must just have a nicer house. <Hayley> ...

• Janus leans against the bookshelf, resting his head on his forearm.
• Hayley trots up behind Janus and turns him around.

<Hayley> How dare you!

• Hayley is all of a sudden very angry!

<Janus> (you are stronger than me, right?) <Hayley> (I certainly am) <Janus> (thought so)

• Janus is whirled.
• Janus blinks in surprise.

<Hayley> How DARE you imply that... that I'd be like that!

• Hayley is angry and has tears in her eyes at the same time.

<Hayley> I've been faithful to you since I've been here, in spite of half my soul screaming to be near Faren!

• Janus narrows his eyes.

<Janus> . o O ( faren, eh... ) <Hayley> How dare you suggest that I'd *play* you like that, against Lord Vale! <Hayley> I LOVE you, god damn it! Every time I hurt you it sends daggers through me too.

• Janus looks away.
• Hayley is losing control of her rage and it's degenerating into angry tears.

<Hayley> Is that how you feel about me? That I'm - just playing you to get things my way? <Hayley> That all this is a *lie*? <Janus> I don't know what to think. <Hayley> I've told you already that the way I feel about you is *real*. You said yourself that nothing else could hurt so much. <Janus> Well why didn't you tell me about Anastasius, then?

• Janus turns his head back and stares down at her.

<Janus> Now I look like a *fool*! <Hayley> Because I knew it would upset you. Why tell you something that would hurt unless I *had* to say it. <Hayley> Why do you look like a fool? <Janus> *He* must certainly think I'm some kind of lovesick idiot, being led around on your little leash <Janus> Meanwhile, you have him working on your problem all this time... <Janus> Obviously, he is aware of *my* work. <Hayley> I haven't seen him for a year. how could he know about your work? <Hayley> I certainly haven't told him. <Janus> Someone did! <Hayley> He knows who you *are* and what you are capable of - who wouldn't? They only teach about you in all the histories!

• Janus brushes past her.

<Hayley> But if he knows the details about your research, it certainly isn't from me. <Janus> They certainly had better not be teaching about *this*!

• • • Paint-It-Black has joined #changeling
• Janus slaps the case which holds the tome of blood magic.

<Hayley> I don't even know what you're doing myself! <Hayley> I don't understand it in the slightest; I can't read Runes. I have no Naming. <Janus> You knew enough to be frightened. <Hayley> ... <Hayley> I remember enough to be frightened. <Hayley> But I haven't told him about what you're doing. Mostly I just talked like a foolish prating child about this man who I was desperately in love with andhow unhappy I was. <Janus> Which one?

• Janus says bitterly.

<Hayley> You. <Hayley> I didn't know of Faren until last Beltaine.

• Hayley feels very tired all of a sudden. She lifts a hand to her forehead.

<Hayley> And then I knew it had started all over again and I ran... <Hayley> You came a few days later. <Hayley> And I have been with you since... you know that; Rook would have told you otherwise. <Hayley> ...

• Janus looks down at the case, spreading his fingers out across the polished wood.

<Janus> ... <Janus> (brb bathroom) <Hayley> (ok) <Paint-It-Black> (I wish this was an EiS week) <Hayley> (hehe) <Hayley> (Next week.  :) ) <Janus> (back) <Hayley> (ok) <Hayley> <w> Blood magic is wrong... according to the Tuatha de Danaan. I wish there were another way, but they have wronged me, anyway - so why should I care any longer? And maybe they only banned it because it made us... too much like them. <Janus> Probably.

• Janus scowls.

<Janus> (ooh, I hates them tuatha) <Elanya> (hee hee hee, if only you knew >:D) <Hayley> It's written into the Escheat, even... not to spill Faerie blood. <Hayley> It *is* dangerous... what if you cut too deep, lose too much? <Janus> I don't care for preaching. <Janus> Leave me alone.

• Janus says tiredly, not looking up.

<Hayley> Yes, Janus... <Hayley> <w> I just meant that I am not so sure whether my fear is *of* you or whether it is of *losing you*.

• Hayley leaves as requested.

<Hayley> (but not before touching him lightly on the shoulder.  :) )